The Second Newsletter, Sept 2007

 

How to prevent anaemia during pregnancy

 

Anaemia is a condition characterized by the presence in the blood of an lower quantity of red globules or haemoglobin compared to normal. These have the important job of conveying the oxygen from the lungs throughout the whole body. A scarce quantity of these cells in the blood doesn't allow our organism to receive enough oxygen to be able to function correctly. Anaemia is a rather complex pathology as there are various types of this problem, each of which have a different cause. Among the most common is the one caused by a lack of iron in the blood, called sideropenic or also iron-deficiency. Iron is, in fact, a fundamental element for the production of red globules and haemoglobin. This is the type of anaemia that is most frequently found in women expecting a child. During pregnancy, the cellular oxygen required by the organism increases to satisfy the needs of the baby who is growing in the womb. The baby absorbs the iron from his mother to produce his own red globules and, accordingly, the quantity of this important mineral can become insufficient for a pregnant woman. For this reason it is rather natural that mothers during pregnancy become anaemic.

 

Within certain limits (10 mg/100ml) this problem is not worrying as, in most cases, the organism of pregnant women will compensate the iron insufficiency by pumping blood to the organs and the tissues faster, so the child receives sufficient blood through the placenta. A light anaemic condition could even not be particularly evident, but if the levels decrease over certain limits a pregnant woman can feel the symptoms which are so typical of this disturbance: a sense of fatigue, weakness, pallor, difficulty in concentration, dizziness, palpitations, breathing problems, irritability.

 

A severe anaemic condition can however cause more series problems: the risks of a premature birth or the possibility that the child is underweight at birth increase. Besides, severe anaemia exposes women to greater risk of infections, especially if complications occur during the birth. It is important, therefore, that the future mother keeps a check on her state of health with periodic laboratory tests. With the complete examination of the blood count and the iron, the possible onset of an anaemia can be detected. The first checks the level of haemoglobin, the second defines the iron situation and gives a more objective idea of the iron resources in the organism.

 

Prevention of the possible onset of an anaemia due to lack of iron lack is essential and a correct diet plays a decisive role. To program a healthy and balanced diet it is important to know that two types of iron exist: the organic iron (eme-iron), necessary for the formation of red blood cells, and inorganic iron (non-eme iron). The first is found in red meats and, in small quantities, in fish, white meats and eggs, and it is what our organism is best able to absorb from foods. The second, is present instead in cereals and vegetables, but is absorbed in small quantities. Nevertheless the absorption of iron from foods improves if these are assumed together with vitamin C (present in citrus fruits, grapes, kiwi, peppers and potatoes), with vitamin B12 (present in the proteins of meat and fish), fructose (present in fruit) and folic acid (present in liver and green vegetables). Tea, coffee and some types of fibres can, however, inhibit the absorption of iron and it is therefore important to limit them. In the cases in which a correct diet has not been enough to avoid the problem, the gynaecologist may decide to prescribe the use of iron supplements. These will be taken until the haemoglobin levels are back to normal.

 

 

An elephant's memory

 

Fifteen billion. This is number of neurones, the nervous cells that regulate the memory process, from birth up to three years of age. This is why this period of time, sustain the neuro-psychologists, is that in which one has the greatest ability to record information and not forget it. Helping the baby, from the first few months, with games and rituals will help him to develop his memory even more. Therefore, later on in life, he can exploit it as a precious resource for learning the more complicated concepts.

 

The memory of a newborn baby is a resource that needs practice. If they are not trained, the synapses, that is the points of connection between the neurones, lose their ability and little by little the mnemonic abilities decrease. It is not difficult to help the maturation of a baby's memory, simply... amuse it. How? Exploiting all five senses, that grow with him and help him to explore the world: hearing and sight, but also touch, taste and smell are used as to enrich the patrimony of memories. Up to three-four months, the baby recognizes, when he sees it, a known object such as a rag doll or his baby bottle, but when this disappears from his visual field he doesn't miss it. In other words, he manages to only remember its existence for a few hours. Nevertheless you can help his memory process allowing the child to interact with these objects. You can propose to him, for example, to look at the toy or the baby bottle, invite him to touch it and hold it. Or you can show the object to him, describing it, and then hide it and make it reappear after a few moments. In this way the baby, towards seven-eight months, will understand that an object exists even if he can't see it: this is the basis of his "patrimony of memories". The object that appears in specific moments also helps the baby to learn the habits that articulate the day: the plate and the glass mean that it is time to eat, the tub his bath time and so on. All this helps the baby to understand the world that surrounds him and to move confidently within it.

 

When the baby is about 12 months old, the memories related to the environment and the familiar objects have been strengthened. Simply watch his reactions: if he drops a toy he looks on the floor, because now he doesn't forget the objects that leave his visual field. If he crawls, he goes towards the basket where he knows that his toys are stored. If it hears the door bell in the evening, he knows that his dad has returned. His memory, during this period, is useful to understand the cause and effect process: he understands that one action leads to another. This learning ability has to be continuously encouraged connecting actions and words. Tell him, for example: "Now it is time to eat", whilst with your hand you can imitate bringing food to your mouth. After eighteen months, the mnemonic abilities of the baby have developed considerably. He helps himself because in this phase he has a great needy to imitate adults. He finds it easy to repeat short songs or nursery rhymes, play repetitive games like stacking objects and making them fall, and then restarting all over again. If, while he is playing, he is distracted, it almost immediately restarts to play because he remembers the action he was doing. If he leaves a cuddly toy in the corridor, he is able to remember it and to go back and get it.

 

After two years of age, his memory becomes more and more similar to that of adults. In his mind his long term memory (that which files the most important data, generally the most pleasant) is differentiated by his short term memory (that records for a short time the facts that the baby perceives as less important). The child for example, remembers a circumstance in which he enjoyed himself well, even if it happened a few weeks before, but he tends to forget to go and get his tooth brush, even if he is told to many times each evening. From this moment on it is important to work on this: on strengthening his short term memory that constitutes the combination of daily gestures and rituals and that leads, over the years, to independence.

 

 

When his first tooth comes through

 

Crying, sleepless nights, lack of appetite, diarrhoea and a slight temperature. This the scenario of a nightmare that is all too often depicted to parents who are waiting with anxiety and worry for the first tooth to come through. So, let's start by immediately putting this into perspective: not always things go so badly. On the contrary, in most cases children gain their first "toothy" smile without too many problems. All the growth phases can certainly involve some difficulties. The important thing is to know what is about to happen and what you can do to help the child to overcome the possible problems.

 

The first tooth generally comes through at around the fifth-sixth month but, as often happens during the growth of a child, also teething is entirely a subjective phenomenon, where every child has his own times: there are children who get their first tooth at three months, or are even born with one or two teeth and babies who show a toothless smile for up to eight-nine months and more. Also the order in which milk teeth grow show a certain variability: first the front incisive teeth, then the side ones; then the first molars, the canines and the second molars. Teething usually starts with the bottom teeth.

 

Now that you know – more or less – how your child's teeth grow, arm yourself with patience and bear in mind that some simple things are all you need to help your child. To relieve pain in the gums, that are inflamed in this period and painful, simply soak some sterile gauzes in cold water or, in the cases of worse suffering and after going to see a paediatrician, you can try some specific anti-inflammatory ointment. From the moment that the baby in this phase he has the tendency to put everything in his mouth and to nibble on all sorts of objects, some valid help can come from teething ring he can bite, specifically designed for the teething phase: they must be kept in a refrigerator because they contain a cooling liquid; something cold, in fact, has a slightly anaesthetic action. Obviously, make sure they are always clean. The same rule applies to your child's hands, to avoid the onset of infections of the mouth or the gastrointestinal tracts,

 

Another phenomenon that occurs during this period is the abundant salivation. It is a defence reaction of the body, that allows it to attenuate the tight feeling of the gum mucous. Nevertheless, the stagnation of saliva can irritate the chin and the cheeks of your child. The best suggestion, is therefore to often dry his mouth with a soft sponge towel, and always make sure he has clean sheets on his bed.

 

As for fever, diarrhoea and lack of appetite, the most feared problems of teething, no scientific tests have related them to this growth phase, but it is true that they occur with a certain frequency. If these problems should occur, common sense and, eventually, that of a paediatrician can certainly help. If the child has a fever, it will perhaps be necessary to use some medicine. If he has gastrointestinal problems (vomit or diarrhoea), it is necessary to give him food little and often, making sure you reinstate the lost liquids. In the case of diarrhoea, it is necessary to change him often, because he could get nappy rash. In the case of lack of appetite, it is preferable to give him some cold or semi-cold foods, because in this phase his gums are particular sensitive. Also teats which are too hard or food which is too hot can bother him. And at bedtime? Well, the arms of his mother and father are the safest place for most children...An toothy smile will broadly repay you for some lost sleep.

 

 

Nightmares that ruin the night

 

The baby has successfully reached his first birthday and his parents are hoping to celebrate with him, with a cake and candles, and also with a few nights of total sleep. But the child keeps waking up. Even shouting, crying, looking for his parents with a greater urgency than when he was born. Whims? Bad habits? None of all this. The child is growing. And he is starting to confront two "grown up" realities: nightmares and being alone in the dark.

 

Night-time troubles that shake younger children, under three years of age, are classified by experts as anguished dreams and anxious awakening. Although they can seem to be two sides of the same coin, they are generated by different causes appear at separate moments during the night. Understanding how they happen can help to individualize the causes and to comfort the child. An anguished dream is a real nightmare, that happens at around 18-24 months. It is related to the oneiric phase, or rather the dream phase, of the child. This phase, also called REM (that is Rapid Eye Movements) is the phase of active sleep, in which a person re-elaborates experiences, recent or past, that he has lived. In small children this cerebral activity is more intense than ever: research has proved that the foetus already dreams when he is in the maternal womb. A small child, who begins to live his first experiences of life (the separation from his mother, kindergarten, a cartoon which worr ied him) dreams a lot and they are not always sweet dreams. The fears, the normal anxiety that accompany these novelties are elaborated by the mind again and, in some cases, they can turn into real nightmares. The anguished dream occurs in the middle of the night, or near to his early-morning awakening, are definitely bad dreams. The REM phases alternate during the night, they are repeated around four or five times per night and they begin after around three hours of deep sleep and finish during the wakening phase. Also the signs are classical: the child cries, he calls for help and is conscious, to the point where nearly always in the morning, if he already knows hog to talk, he will be able to tell you about the dream that upset him.

 

The so-called "anxious awakening" has other characteristics, a demonstration of fear that can occur at any moment during the night. In fact it is not related to the oneiric activity, but it is caused by the fear of the child of being alone, in the dark, away from his parents. In these cases there is no shouting or crying: the child simply calls his mother and father and is calmed if he is cuddled, because he is fully conscious. In the morning, he doesn't talk about scary dreams.

 

What should you do about these small problems? Starting from the fact that it is normal that they occur, considering that they are part of the growth process, you can try to limit them. A light supper is good for the general well-being of your child, therefore it helps him to get off to sleep more easily. A relaxing activity, during late afternoon and evening (no TV or loud music, it is better to read or play sedentary games, better still if it with both parents) are able to reassure him of the affection of his mother and father. If he wakes up, console him with lots of cuddles, possibly in his own bedroom. Taking him into your own bed is practical and definitely comforts him, but it must not become a habit. Only by getting used to his own bed can the baby overcome his fears.

 

 

Getting up without tantrums

 

In so many families getting up in the morning can turn into a tiresome struggle. Waking up, getting the children ready and convincing them to go the kindergarten represents, for many parents, a real battle. Some tips can help mothers and fathers to convince children to serenely face the early-morning awakenings without too many protests.

 

First of all, to bed early in the evening! It is, perhaps, the most obvious tip, but to respect it, it is often necessary to review family life schedules again, maybe even supper time. A good sleep is essential for his growth and allows the child to wake up him without difficulty. During the day the child consumes so much energy and it is essential that he regains his strength with the right number of hours sleep: from 11 to 13 hours for children from 3 to 5 years of age. Get your child used to keeping regular hours that help him to get good restful and refreshing sleep, without forgetting, if possible, his afternoon naps. Plan a pleasant ritual before going to bed, this will allow the child to peacefully fall asleep. It is also opportune to always allow him to sleep in the same environment: his own bedroom, quiet and well aired, can ensure your child the rest he needs.

 

Besides allowing the child to sleep well, it is important to be particularly careful during the wakeup phase. This is because it is a delicate moment for the child and it is important that it happens gently. In the morning therefore avoid all noise or situations that can upset and shake the child. On the contrary, approach him with some affectionate gestures, and whisper to him that it is time to wake up. Allow some light to enter the room and stimulate him speaking to him about the nice things waiting for him at the kindergarten. It is important to create a positive and serene atmosphere in the house when he has to get up. A good dose of joy is definitely the best way to face the day. Accompany the preparations for the kindergarten with some lively music, can be useful to cheer up his mood and that of the entire family. It is best to avoid shouting or reproaching the child if he starts to play up. Try instead to make this moment of the early-morning preparations more playful, helping the child to consider the day as something amusing to face. Children are generally rather slow. Don't hurry him therefore and make sure he can do things calmly. Doing everything in a hurry could easily bother him besides making him waste his energy before starting the day. Calculate the time he needs to get ready. Organize his clothes and everything he needs for the day the night before, this can help to optimize your time.

 

After facing the alarm clock and the preparations, it often happens that a child starts to protest when it is time to go to the kindergarten: he doesn't want to go to school. In this case it is important first of all to try to understand what is upsetting him. It could be a problem with the other children or with the teachers and it is necessary therefore to intervene in order to resolve the situation. But it could also be simply the fact that he doesn't feel like going to school. In this case it is necessary to try to resolve the situation with some small strategies. You can, for instance, allow him to choose what to wear or what to take for a snack, something which is particularly special and tasty: alternatively you can try to organize something amusing to do when he gets back, such as to invite some friends over to play together after kindergarten. Avoid in any case trying to convince him with phrases like "don't make a fuss you are a big boy now", as t his could make him think that growing up is equivalent to being separated from the family and therefore he will not feel protected. On the contrary, it is important that the child, when he enters the kindergarten, does not feel abandoned. For this reason, try to exchange some affectionate gestures with your child, always say goodbye to him with hugs and caresses and console him with some words of encouragement. With a little patience, sweetness and a pinch of imagination the early-morning appointment can become more simple and change into a pleasant moment for the child and the entire family.

 

 

Never alone on the...web

 

Today's children and youths are born and grow up together with computers and the Internet. They call them the E-generation. But an E-generation needs E-parents. The network of networks is a great resource but, to use it properly, it is necessary to reflect on the risks and opportunities, without getting into a panic and using the rules of a healthy and solid parent-children relationship. When using the web and in the relationship with new technologies mother and father have to be a lighthouse for navigation, a reference point when one gets lost in the great sea of the Internet.

 

Most children first approach the web when they start primary school. How can you educate a 6 year-old child to navigate safely. The first rule is to navigate under observation. The approach to the Internet must be guided and guarded by parents: in other words, navigate with your child and help him to look for the answers to his questions and his curiosities. Navigation of the smallest cybernauts can be handled, in the sense that they tend to look for information on specific websites with contents specifically designed for them, such as the websites of their heroes or those of their favourite TV programmes. The use for schoolwork, on the other hand, can lead them away from these protected contents, and it is important that mother and father are able to address the navigation toward the most useful contents for homework or school research project. If a child accidentally lands on a site with contents that are not suitable for him, don't be alarmed, but explain to him cal mly that there are websites that it is best not to visit as they are useless and not suitable for children.

If your child is older however, he will want more freedom when navigating and will begin to use the web as a form of exchange, knowledge and a means of creating relationships, using for instance instant message services, forums and chatrooms that allow him come into contact both with his real friends that virtual ones. Apart from being a virtual meeting place, the Internet represents a door to unknown territories. At this point, all the safety devices that you have installed on the PC at home are useless, from the program-filter to the dedicated browsers for children: your child is now grown up and he knows that outside the walls of his home, and a friend's PC which has less protection, he can access the contents that you have "forbidden". In this delicate phase, you will reap the fruits of that relationship of trust that over the years you have managed to build up: if you have gradually informed the child of the existence of dangers on the web, from those painfully known as paedophile-pornography to the problem of mailing of discriminatory or racist material, if you have told him that you can be tricked and defrauded on the web, if you have gained ground as guides and advisers and not as repressive figures, if the child knows that he can count on you for whatever doubts or problems he may have during navigation, then you will have given him the correct antibodies and the critical spirit to be a good cybernaut.

 

Even in conditions of trust, however, some simple rules don't go to waste: remind your child that, in relationships created on the web, it is advisable to use a nickname, and not disclose his real identity or give away his address, telephone numbers, photos etc. Explain to him that it is not obligatory to answer all the questions that he is asked on the web. Tell him that if someone asks him if he is alone in the house, what school he attends, if he can send some photos of other children, if he can give him presents in exchange for photos or other, this person may not good intentions. Also explain to him that it is necessary to cultivate real relationships not only virtual ones, that apart from online games there are also forms of exchange without a computer where it is possible to do things that are not possible online, and learn how to face difficulties, be accepted by others for the person one is and to be more altruist and compassionate.